THE PART EVERYONE LEAVES OUT

It is extremely comforting to remember that the greatest things in life take time. It took Gandhi 27 years to liberate the people of India. Einstein had to wait 14 years for a solar eclipse to prove his theory of relativity. Walt Disney spent 10 years failing and even became homeless before his empire took off.

It is absolutely no secret that the fast paced world we live in today has affected our ability to be patient. Gaining awareness for this impatience is the first step to cultivating some well deserved inner peace! By first witnessing our impatience in a waiting room, for instance, we can unlock the door to freedom in the present moment.

The same can apply when we are awaiting the manifestation of professional accomplishments. While some people give up before they even try due to a fear of failure, others are simply too impatient to keep going. Impatience creates resistance to the flow of co-creation with the universe. It also creates inner resistance because we put ourselves in a place of non-acceptance and lower our vibrational frequency.

While impatience affects our physical manifestations, we can go a step further or better yet, a step inwards and gain awareness for how impatience even affects our ability to be more positive in life. This impatience is reflected in our inner dialogue. We all have inner voices. We even have thoughts worded and amplified in our mothers’ voices! Cultivating empowering inner dialogue is also something that requires patience.

If you’re someone who has experienced daily verbal and mental abuse, cultivating empowering dialogue and becoming your own cheerleader is something that will take time and patience. When I first started to gain awareness and change my thought patterns, I experienced a lot of back and forth. There where days when I felt extremely uncomfortable and even a little crazy. My inner conversation went something like this:

-“What’s the point of even trying? There’s no way this meeting is going to work out.”

-“Stop it why are you always putting yourself down?! It’s time to change!”

-“If you don’t f***ing get to it.. it will never happen. Stop kidding yourself tee..”

-“What is wrong with you?! You can’t even have a little positive inner dialogue!”

-“I’m exhausted…”

Till this day I have moments of impatience as negative thoughts intrusively creep into my head, but with time and practice I’ve grown to accept and release them. I continued to release my thoughts through writing until the the inner dialogue became something like this:

-“What’s the point..?”

-“I recognize this limiting thought as a false belief. I choose to forgive and let it go. I choose to focus on all that is positive in my life.”

(This where I pull out my journal or go into meditation, yoga or mindfulness)

The part that everyone leaves out is that it is perfectly okay to feel discomfort as you alter your habits. It is perfectly okay to even feel a little crazy as you empower your thoughts. It is perfectly okay to take the time you need to undo years of conditioning.

Be kind and be patient with yourself.

With loving energy,

Tee

THE $3 THERAPY

A breaking point can turn into a breakthrough with one key ingredient: the willingness to feel better no matter what it takes. This is the kind of willingness that involves shattering the foundations of our core values, rewiring our beliefs and re-centering our navigation. This rebirth, is not one that thrives on quick fixes and distractions. It requires an honest approach.

I remember when I made feeling better a priority in my life. It one was the clearest turning points of my life. I wanted to feel better at any cost. I wanted to find out who I am and started to ask the bigger questions in life. But all at the same time there was so much I had to forgive myself for. I felt such an urge to finally accept and thus release all the lower vibrational feelings (stress, fear, anxiety and depression) that were pretty much riding me my whole life.

Through my 27 years of life, many people encouraged me write. I just couldn’t picture myself carrying a diary! I even sought a psychologist in my teenage years who really tried to get me to journal my thoughts. I resisted this idea so much and couldn’t understand why she wasn’t giving me a real solution. There was noway that something so simple could solve my complicated feelings, until I met a total stranger in a nearby park who changed my life. His name was Aaron.

Aaron was the kind of person who wore a smile on his face at all times. I had seen him wandering barefoot in the park throughout that spring season. He wore the simplest clothes and carried a journal and satchel around with him no matter where he went. Authenticity shot rays of light out of his physical body.  I can’t say for sure what attracted me to him, but it felt like the divine timing of synced energies. After sharing his story with me, I was fascinated by this person even more. As our conversation went on, I expressed my willingness to feel better and, you guessed it! He encouraged me to write.

That afternoon, I bought a notebook and thought, “I have nothing to lose.” That night I opened my notebook and wrote two awkward sentences before my words spilt onto almost half the book. I just couldn’t stop writing. Some pages were written with so much anger I had pierced holes through the pages! But the more I wrote, the more I felt better. I chose to disconnect from the world and left the city whenever I got the chance. I took my notebook everywhere with me. As time went by I felt physically lighter! I felt like I was floating through life unhinged by any emotional weight tugging at me.

I had always thought that physical exercise was my outlet, until I realized how much I was neglecting my soul. Writing allowed me to reconnect with myself. I learnt that writing is more than just filling out school examinations and presenting summaries or essays in exchange for a grade, but I couldn’t see it because I had put up my walls of judgement and resistance for years, until writing was all I had left.

I truly hope this entry inspires you to finally pick up that pen and paper and feel good! Below, are some other hidden powers that writing has to offer you:

1. by keeping a journal you are able to reflect on your experiences, increase your awareness and reevaluate your life values. Writing has the ability to improve every, yes every, area of your life!
2. Journaling allows you to cultivate gratitude and presence. A bad mood can easily be switched into feelings of fullness and abundance by jotting down a few of the things in you life that you are grateful for. Gratitude lists have the powerful ability to get your mind off future desire and into current blessings.
3. A simple to do list has the power to accelerate the manifestation of your goals!

“A dream written down with a date Becomes a goal.”

With loving energy,

Tee

 

 

DEEP BREATHING

A few months ago, a friend of mine was having a bit of a breakdown as she felt helpless to several areas of her life that came tumbling down. It was the first time I watched her surrender her obsessive need to control every outcome in her life. It was also the first time I decided to change my approach towards her. I dropped any need to over-protect her and tell her what she should and should not do. Instead, I chose to listen.

By listening I gave her the floor to do some serious purging of pent up emotions. When she was done, I asked her to take three deep breaths, I took each and every breath right along with her. I didn’t even have to say anything before she blurted out, “Wow! I can’t remember the last time I took a long deep breath!” I watched her have an intense epiphany, cool down and instantly feel relieved. I saw a sparkle in her eye and a newborn commitment to herself. Thus began her journey of self-love.

The point is, we never realize how subconsciously quick and shallow are breaths really are until we take a single and conscious deep breath. In an instant we are relaxed and suddenly aware of  how tense our bodies have been, from our neck and shoulders right down to our feet! Go ahead and give it a go! Day in and day out our stress levels keep our breath intake on the surface, barely going deeper than our chest. This has a lot to do with our fast paced and complicated  lives as well as our fluctuating emotions. No wonder we’re exhausted!

This entry is to remind you of your long forgotten superpowers! A lifelong ego trip can make you oblivious and even forget just how magical breathing really is for the mind and body! Below are some reminders:

1. When we breathe deeply, we oxygenate our bodies which in turn rejuvenates our cells. Cell rejuvenation is what prevents the growth and duplication of abnormal cells. Therefore, conscious inhalations and exhalations are the most powerful ways to self heal! Shallow or irregular breaths prevents full oxygenation of our bodies leaving us even more anxious.

2. Research shows that different emotions are associated with particular breathing patterns. For example, anxiety, anger and fear are associated with quick and shallow breaths, whereas a state of happiness is associated with slower and deeper breaths. However, interestingly enough, emotional states and breathing patterns can work in reverse! That is, conscious short and quick breaths will put you into an anxious state and intentional long deep breaths can bring peace and serenity back into your life.

3. Deep breaths have the ability to bring us back into alignment by bringing us back to the present moment. It is like a portal or grounding technique to get us out of our heads and into our souls.

4. We often get caught up in overthinking and find it difficult to make a decision, but how can a stressed person ever make a good decision? Deep breaths have the ability to clear your head and enable you to act out of intuition.

5. There is a big difference between sleeping and resting. Sleeping for long hours during the day can, in fact make you even more tired and groggy! A healthy sleep routine, along with a regular meditation practice or frequent deep breaths throughout the day can give your body and mind the energy revitalization that you’ve been seeking! Increased oxygen results in increased blood flow which results in increased energy levels!

6. We often forget that exhalation is just as important as inhalation. Shallow breath intakes also means short exhalations.  The process of  full exhalation results in the ejection of carbon dioxide, thus detoxifying the body!

7.  Cancer and other diseases develop in bodies that dominate the acidic half of the pH scale. Shallow breaths advance further acidity, but deep breaths actually have the ability to alkalize the body!

8. It is almost impossible to take a deep breath with a a crouched posture! That is evidence enough to suggest that deep breathing can enforce a good and empowering posture!

Need I say more? Breathing is something we do every second of everyday! Moreover, our bodies are busy breathing even when we are totally asleep! If that’s not magic, I don’t know what is! Be reminded of the miracle that is you! Your body is your temple getting you through this crazy game called life! Love your body enough to go back to basics and give your mind the peace its been longing for!

With loving energy,

Tee

 

 

TICK. TOCK.

Albert Einstein was once asked to explain his theory concerning time relativity. His response:

“When you sit with a nice girl for two hours you think it’s only a minute, but when you sit on a hot stove for a minute you think it’s two hours. That’s relativity.”

Mind blowing.

What Einstein dared to explain is that it’s all in our heads! Life is relative to our perception of reality. Have you ever been in a waiting room and focused on time so much that it almost feels like your stuck in time?

In a world so insta-sized, we feel as though we are constantly running out of time. Instant noodles, Instagram and “instant relief” remedies are all quite recent terminologies in relation to the length of human existence. Our life now happens at “the click of a button.” It’s no secret that we’re living in a fast paced world and we often feel the pressures of keeping up. There is no doubt that this combination of speed and pressure is why we are all experiencing increased levels of stress, depression and anxiety. We are constantly bombarded by emails, texts, media, social media and phone calls to a point where we actually feel uneasy and “lost” when we lose or break our phones! We even feel disconnected from the world and suddenly alone!

Technology is like a double edged sword.While it makes us feel bombarded, it also makes our lives a lot easier! Could you imagine waiting months for a pigeon to bring back a written letter from a loved one? Not to mention all the innovations and advancements that have helped us in the fields of science and medicine. We are also instantly connected to the rest of the world! That’s pretty exciting!

Considering that our “waiting time” has been reduced exponentially over the years, why are we constantly running out of time? As perceivers of time and reality, perhaps we’re not running out of time but our constant need for more makes us feel like we can’t keep up!

It is not time that we’re trying to keep up with, but rather ourselves. Our ego’s are on one hell of a desire trip. We run on “likes” and the next big thing. We’ve even developed a fear of missing out (FOMO) because the internet allows us to exists in more than one space, even on a virtual level.  We now exist physically and virtually. Our depression dominates when we feel like our virtual existence is far from the truth. This gap between who we really are and what we portray, makes us feel like we need to pursue more to keep up. All while neglecting our spiritual essence.

When our minds are constantly focused on the future, feelings of stress and anxiety dominate. That is because our bodies are trying to keep up with our mind on fast forward. Some of us are either imprisoned and depressed by the past, anxious for the future or a combination of both. But these projections can be altered!

The key to freedom is in the present moment. 

When we root ourselves into the present moment our minds are not concerned with neither, the past or the future. Time no longer exists in the present moment because you are in a state of being, rather than thinking. Our senses are engaged with our surroundings, clear of any thoughts.

Being present isn’t something we haven’t done before! Try and remember an embrace with a loved one when time didn’t matter, or a moment when you were dancing or painting, maybe even playing a instrument or spinning records. Alan Watts once said:

“The sound of the rain needs no translation. In music one doesn’t make the end of the composition the point of the composition… Same way in dancing, you don’t aim at one particular spot in the room… The whole point of dancing is the dance.”

The idea is to get out of heads and into our hearts by doing and thinking less, and being more:

1. Pursuing a passion makes makes time fly, yes enjoyable! Wouldn’t you rather warp time in your favor?
2. Meditation. Frequent meditations can help you cultivate more presence and peace in your life by becoming the non-judgmental witness of your thoughts. See “Meditation Simplified” entry.
3. Mindfulness is another way to bring awareness to everything that we already do by engaging our senses. See “Mindfulness 101”
4. Adopt a pet! Pets have the ability to bring joy, presence and even healing into your life.
5. Train yourself to consciously see the beauty in everything around you at all times.
6. Daily gratitude lists can help you realize all that is positive in your life now, rather than preoccupy yourself with future desires.

 

BRAINWAVES

Learning about how our bodies operate and function has always fascinated me. Do you ever wonder how each and every cell just knows exactly what to do? Every single day our bodies work hard to keep us alive! As Dawkins, brought to my attention, we have been in constant search of magic and miracles, whilst it has been right inside of us all along! We are actually walking, talking miracles!

Over the years, we seem to have grown desensitized to this wonder as our focus has moved from inwards to outwards. That is, due to the pressures of gaining societal acceptance. Moreover, most of us have taken our bodies for granted and have even neglected our mental health because we are too busy with the never-ending chase for outer validation, through material stuff and status. I know I did!

When I decided to put my mental and physical health first, I turned to meditation to help relieve my stress and anxiety. I was also more enthusiastic to learn more about the human brain and the way it works. Below are four different brainwave frequencies that are closely linked how we feel and behave:

BETA BRAIN

The Beta brainwaves are 12 – 38 Hz and represent our regular wakeful state of consciousness during day-to-day tasks in the outside world. This state allows for alertness, problem solving, judgement, decision making and other mental activities. Beta brainwaves reflect a stressful or anxious state commonly known as “fight or flight,” where harmful cortisol hormones and adrenaline are at an all time high.

ALPHA BRAIN

Alpha brainwaves are 8 – 12 Hz and represent a calmer state. Our alpha brainwaves are in action when we have less chaotic thoughts and a more relaxed mind in general. Alpha represents more presence in the now, than Beta, hence the the production of serotonin (happy chemical).  We can bring our state from a Beta to Alpha through mindful breathing.

THETA BRAIN

Theta brainwaves are 3 – 8 Hz and and represent our sleeping state (REM) as well as other deep meditative states. This particular state is the “gateway” to higher states of consciousness, inner intuition, entranced states, astral travel and more.

DELTA BRAIN

Delta brainwaves are within 0.5 – 3 Hz. They are very slow and generated in the deepest of meditative states, dreamless sleep or comatose states. Delta brainwaves assist in major healing and cell regeneration. While, alpha and theta waves are capable of bridging the gap between the conscious and subconscious mind, delta waves allow for a much deeper connection.

Overall, our brainwaves change in relation to what we’re thinking and feeling. Slower brainwaves dominate when we feel tired, down or slow. The higher frequencies are dominant when we feel attentive and alert. Health is not only reflected by what we eat but also by what we think, say and do. Brainwaves reflect our mental health, which is, just as important as physical health.

A healthy brain should be shifting between from delta/theta waves to alpha and then back to theta/delta waves. Unfortunately, most of us shift between beta and delta waves, due to stressful mornings, busy schedules and crashing delta sleep cycles.

HOW?

1. Meditation and yoga are the most ancient and natural ways to bring a healthier brainwaves into a healthier balance (see “Meditation” blog for more information)
2. Strengthening our neuroplasticity (brain neuro-pathways or associations) is also a way to ensure healthy brain activity, especially with age, which can be done through games that stimulate the mind, or learning a new language.
3. Music is one of the most effective ways to alter your brain waves and stress levels. Shamanic drumming, classical music and engineered frequencies have the ability to put the brain into a more relaxed alpha/theta state of mind.
4. Exercise is a great way to reduce stress and depression as well as excess weight. Exercise produces an increase in dopamine and serotonin catapulting the brain into alpha and theta states.

Keeping your brain healthy, means keeping your body healthy as well, as stress and anxiety affect us both mentally and physically. I hope this information has added, even if just the slightest, of  value to your life and inspired you to take control of your mental health.

With loving energy,

Tee

SHAKE IT OFF

How often does the feeling of utter doom creep up on you? We’re all victims of that doom, question is where does it come from and how does it have the power to totally paralyze us? I’m talking about anxiety. It seems that no matter what status, wealth, background, color, race, orientation or gender, we are all suffering from varying degrees of anxiety. I know I’ve felt anxiety ridden almost my whole life!

Anxiety is an intrusive feeling of worry or concern that has the ability to catch us off guard and completely consume us! Some of us have completely surrendered in the face of anxiety and accepted it as part of our lives. Why is it that we feel like something just has to go wrong?

Let’s break it down..

Our health is not only based on what we eat but also what we think and say (you may refer to my earlier blog entry “Holistic Health” for more information.) But let’s tackle the former for now. Right now, is your opportunity to grab a pen and paper and finally admit to yourself if you’ve been abusing any anxiety induced habits. This includes smoking, caffeine, drugs, alcohol and even fast food. Remember that we cannot begin to fix a problem before we identify it.

We seem to underestimate the power of replacing even just one small old habit with new one. We feel like we need radical solutions to our problems. We overcomplicate our lives, because we presume that the solution just cannot be that simple. Keep in mind that this perception is simply not true, it is nothing more than another layer of false beliefs. When I shifted my bed time from 3am to 11pm, I can honestly say my life changed! I felt way more energetic and peaceful. I wondered why I resisted such a minor change for so long and realized that I was just too suspicious and pessimistic towards the simplicity of this solution! With time, I quit smoking and significantly reduced my alcohol intake and experienced even bigger improvements in the way I felt. Nobody is expecting you to wake up one morning and suddenly change all of the above. Make only small but believable changes, and test out your own levels of anxiety. Don’t take my word for it! See for yourself!

Why do we resist dropping our addictions so much? Intellectually, we know they are holding us back. Yet, emotionally we can’t seem to shake them. This indicates that we are emotionally driven in our behavior. After accepting our addictions as escapism, we must find a way to make positive neuro-associations to change. That is, mentally associating change with pleasure and positive outcomes. Picture yourself overcoming your addiction and living a fuller life! Choose creative replacements to your habits and visualize them flourishing into talents or productivity.

Anxiety, although a feeling, must’ve stemmed from some kind of thought process to begin with, also known as a belief system. Reality, as we know is based on our perception. Be it conscious or subconscious, our thoughts are what direct our feelings and create our realities. We can say, that overthinking, specifically about the past or future, is synonymous with anxiety.

Now that we’ve broken it down, we can begin to self-heal and break free. The first and most important step to gaining freedom from anxiety, is by gaining awareness. This means recognizing your anxiety as nothing more than a feeling driven by thought. By recognizing your anxiety for what it is from the view of a witness, rather than a victim, you are able to unidentify. You can even say out loud “I recognize my anxiety for what is it. I am not my anxiety. This too shall pass.” Here we are choosing to accept our feelings by coming to terms with them, instead of resorting to further escapism through drugs or other addictions.

After gaining awareness we can begin to bring ourselves back into spiritual alignment. It is extremely vital to start cultivating kindness towards yourself. This takes place in the form of empowering and kind self dialogue. We’ve already spent way too much energy diving into never ending cycles of self judgmental, and we know for sure that hasn’t helped. So a little positive self talk can be worse than what we’ve been doing thus far. You can even say out aloud “I witness my anxiety as a byproduct of fear, and honor my power by choosing self-love. I ask the universe/god/higher power to guide me.” Here you are expanding your consciousness and inviting a feeling of instant relief by giving it up!

You can then, move on to either of the below techniques. I encourage you to experiment with either of them and see which works for you!

1. EFT – Emotional Freedom Tapping

EFT is a self-help technique in which you use your finger tips to tap on the above points which are identified in traditional acupuncture as energy pathways of the body known as meridians. As soon as you feel your anxiety kicking in, start tapping each meridian 4-5 times and say: “Even though I feel this anxiety, I deeply and completely accept myself.”

The order of tapping is as follows:

1. Karate chop (outer side of the hand)
2. Top of the head (crown of the head)
3. Eyebrow (where eyebrow starts)
4. Side of the eye
5. Under eye
6. Under nose
7. Between lower lip and chin
8. Start of collar bone
9. Under arm where bra strap usually goes.

The goal is to continue repeating the circuit until you feel like your problem moves from a rating of 10 to 0. You may even feel silly while doing it, but wouldn’t you rather laugh at yourself? 🙂

2. Breath-Awareness Meditation

This type of meditation has the ability to recenter your thoughts and alter your frequency of vibrations by bringing you back to a place of deep peace and silence.

The meditation is simple an is as follows:

1. Breathe in for three counts if you’re a beginner, or 4 counts if you are familiar with meditation.
2. Hold your breath for three counts.
3. Exhale for three.

Now I know what you’re thinking, “Tee, give me a REAL solution!” The truth is that we’ve managed to overcomplicate the solutions in our minds. Breathing is the ultimate tool for changing our vibrations. Heres why, when we feel anxious or terrified we take small rapid breaths from the top of our lungs. By altering your breathing rate and pattern, and by taking long deep breaths you have the power to calm your mind and body. Ultimately you are changing the rhythm of your breathing to change the rhythm of your vibrations.

Go for this meditation as many time as you can during the day for how ever length of time you require to feel better!

3. Journaling

Most of us take time and practice to develop positive self-talk and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. Journaling on a daily basis and writing your feelings down is whats iv’e called many time before “the 3$ therapy.” Writing is therapeutic because there is a sense of release when we see your emotions  out on the paper in front of us. You can even resort to writing, to dig deep and learn the source of negative emotions.

Write until you feel better. Continue writing your way into happiness. At the start of my journey, whenever I felt major frustrations my hand writing was rugged and angry. Sometimes I was so angry I wrote right through my paper! Yes, I ripped holes right through my page! My words were met with so much resistance, but as I continued I felt better and better.

4. Mindfulness

Mindfulness techniques, like meditation, allow us to get out of our minds and into the present moment. Below is a mindfulness technique you can use to bring peace and presence into your life:

1. Start by identifying 5 things you can see within your surroundings
2. 4 things you can hear
3. 3 things you can feel (shoes, clothes, accessories, breath)
4. 2 things you can smell
5. 1 thing you can taste

Shifting your focus to your sense has the ability to interrupt anxious thoughts and ground you in the present moment.

I truly hope this entry helps you with any degree of anxiety you may be feeling, just keep in mind that peace is a cultivated process. To maintain peace as your lifestyle and philosophy embrace the 3 Cs of practice: Commitment, Consistency, and Connection.

Remain committed to your practice and healing. By being here, you’ve already accomplished that! Consistent practice results in thicker neurological pathways which strengthens your new habits into your new lifestyle. Finally, embrace your connection to the divine energy around you which is at your disposal at all times.

With loving energy,

Tee